Chairman Meow Speaks

  • Holiday Cards w/ Cats & Dogs: Fun Design Ideas + Coupons

    Posted on 11/04/2016 by | 0 comments

    Christmas & Holiday Card Designs with Dogs & Cats – It has becoming increasingly popular to send holiday cards out that feature the family pet. Here are some of the best inexpensive holiday card designs online to feature dogs or cats: Shutterfly Holiday Card Ideas for Dogs & Cats Shutterfly is the most popular site online for printing

  • Kitteh Confusion? Man Takes In “Cat,” Gets Rabies

    Posted on 10/21/2016 by | 0 comments

    Chairman Meow Says: Apparently there haz been some confusion as 2 what iz a kitteh, and what iz not a kitteh. (Perhaps iz due in part to recent Fox News segment entitled, “Possums: Are They Just Liberal Cats?”) In any event Please allow Great Teacher Chairman Meow to clear up confusion. Hmmm… It this a kitteh? First,

  • Chairman Meow Calls for Boycott of Canis Minor Constellation

    Posted on 07/27/2016 by | 0 comments

    The Canis Minor constellation dates back to the 2nd century, and is recognized as one of the 88 modern constellations. The Latin name translates to, “lesser dog,” and Chairman Meow couldn’t agree more. You see, this constellation, advertised as some kind of fluffy dog, consists of only two stars, meaning that whoever named it and

  • Why Martha Washington Named Their Cat after Alexander Hamilton

    Posted on 06/26/2016 by | 1 comment

    A tomcat named after Alexander Hamilton – Rumor has it that founding father Alexander Hamilton was a bit of a dog when it came to the ladies. Actually, you could say he was more of a tomcat; or at least George Washington’s wife, Martha, thought so. That’s apparently why Martha Washington named their feral tomcat

  • Kim Jong-Un Warns Cats: I Haz a Giant Space-Laser Pointer

    Posted on 04/09/2016 by | 1 comment

    AP: Kim Jong Un Threatens Cats With Giant Space-Laser – In what appears to be retaliation after a recent alliance between Lenin Cat and Chairman Meow, North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un warned that he has obtained a “giant space-laser,” saying: “The kitteh can not resist the laser beam. I have personally instructed my scientists to

  • Humpty Dumpty, Entropy, & Gold

    Posted on 03/28/2016 by | 1 comment

    Dear Chairman Meow, Is gold real money? – Janet, Washington, D.C. Ah, thank you for your question, Janet. Chairman Meow is a very knowledgeable and observant cat with a healthy distrust for human governments. Allow him to teach you about a concept called, “entropy,” that is pervasive in our world, and tell you why it

  • Who Is Ceiling Cat? A Brief History of this Divine Celestial Kitty

    Posted on 03/21/2016 by | 1 comment

    Ask Chairman Meow: Dear Glorious Leader Chairman Meow: who is Ceiling Cat? – Timmy, Austin TX Thank you for your sincere, but slightly naive question, Timmy. Unlike your false digital idol, Siri, Chairman Meow has true knowledge of all things. Now, I will fumigate my wisdom of Ceiling Cat upon you. Who Is Ceiling Cat?

  • Intelligent Design, or Proof of Kitty Evolution?

    Posted on 03/19/2016 by | 0 comments

    Scientists: Are Cats Rapidly Evolving? – In a shocking press release today, Chairman Meow has provided scientific evidence that cats are evolving at a stunning pace. The stunning photo (provided by Paula R.) clearly shows “Ophelia,” sitting upright like a human. Believing that she was not being observed, the kitty then reportedly picked up a

  • Kim Jong Un Assembles a Girl Band: Chairman Meow Responds With Challenge

    Posted on 12/11/2015 by | 2 comments

    “…I’m in command, hot damn, I got an all-girl band!” – Salt n’ Peppa In a move seems to directly challenge Chairman Meow and other world leaders, Kim Jong Un has assembled a  state-sponsored North Korean army girl band. In this newly released video, you can watch them playing toe-tapping propaganda favorites like “Let’s Support

  • Cats Aid In Brussels Lockdown; Fight Terrorism

    Posted on 11/24/2015 by | 1 comment

    Belgians Fight Terror With Lolcat Photos: Brussels, Belgium was put on lock-down under the highest level of terror alert this week. Humans were asked to stay indoors while anti-terrorism raids were carried out in Belgium, and asked not to tweet or share anything about the raids on social media. The concern was that terrorists might

  • Chairman Meow Promises to Send Cat to Mars: Commissions T-Shirt Design

    Posted on 09/30/2015 by | 1 comment

    Upon hearing that there is water on Mars, Great Leader Chairman Meow has quickly promised to send a cat there to search for fishes, issuing the following statement: “Since the Soviets sent a dog to space, we have been waiting for a good reason to respond by launching a kitteh into orbit. We haz waited